Its a small world

I took a trip up to the mountains last weekend so I could recoup from city life and get my fill of nature. I enjoyed the cool breeze, the crisp mountain air, and the vibrant foliage. Naturally, I felt like I wanted to take some of this home with me, so I decided to take some snapshots of things that caught my eye. As I went along the path I was intrigued by the color of a certain tree's leaves with red stems. I climbed up a branch or two and got in position to take a picture when suddenly a large fly landed on the leaf in focus, with a peculiar little man riding it. I quickly took a picture, so I could prove that what I saw was real, and then tried to catch the large fly and small man riding it. The thought soon entered into my mind "I could make my fortune!". I could sell them to the circus!!! It took a couple minutes, but I finally succeeded in catching the little buggers. My plan would have worked, but the little man was more stink-bug than human. As soon as I had him in my grasp his defense mechanism kicked in, which was to flatulate unceasingly. After several whifs of this pungeant smell I was abliged to release him back to his native habitat and to his fly escort........ Here is proof of the incident!!!
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As I continued to ponder what I saw, I couldn't help but question "Was I at a high enough of an altitude to give me altitude sickness and hallucinations..?" "Or could it have been the funny little berries I found and ate as I was on the trail?" Finally the answer popped into my head.. This was no hallucination nor dream!! This was real!!! Gal-darn it how could I be so forgetful!!! I just proved the legend of the TOOT-FAIRY!!!! The toot fairy rides his fly into your bedroom at night and releases an unmistakable odor in your bedroom. Sometimes he is so sneaky, he can even get under your bed sheets, so he can prolong his magic, and when your wife least expects she turns over in the bed and the great trapped odor is rushes into your her face, which results in immediate smack that knocks you out of your deep sleep. Yes, he has no remorse!! His main target is the elderly... at any moment, during any occasion, he is able to exert his power on them!!! He attacks them so often that they dont even realize what they have done!!! I and many other grandchildren can attest to this!!!